School. Uni life. I wonder how much longer i can hold on. Almost broke down these few days.. there are just too much work and lots of concepts to understand. And the thing is the amount of concepts that we dont understand just keeps on piling up because there isnt much time for us to go through them. On top of that, there's this lab formal report that we are supposed to do. Now no one is there to help me, and i have to face this bravely myself.

Fumin, i miss u. I wish you were there for me, at least i can complain to you and then call you in the middle of the night to ask you maths or science questions.

I was reading fumin's blog, and i realised i miss those times in aj too.. Shall also blog about what i miss.

- Coming to sch very early in the morning and seeing weejia walking in that forever slow pace.
- Sitting down at the parade square with weijing and weejia and crapping bout' lame stuffs, then observing people as they walked past.
- Secretly looking at iceman.
- Dozing off in lectures, especially maths.
- Fumin's mentos to wake us up, and we would pinch each other to keep awake.
- Salt's high-pitched voice, and her way of calling my name.
- Mr Ng's constant knocking on the board with his marker.
- Daljit's pink "shou tao" outfit which made me and fumin laughed for a good whole 2 hrs, and her "Alright okay.", plus her constant nagging at us to read the newspapers.
- Mr Sanuse's 2+6 own time own target
- William chua's pouch, and not forgetting his packet of coffee every morning. PLUS his sunglasses. Haha
- Chinese lectures.. where every thurs, me and fumin will go into the lecture hall early to play with the mike. Imitate the lecturers' actions and then singing out loud.
- Not listening to chinese lectures, because it was total crap.
- Always packing our things to go for break even before the lecturer had finished teaching.
- When the bell rang, and the 3 girls behind would be gone. (Tw, Kl and Krys)
- DJ's way of sleeping in lectures, then me and fumin will be laughing at him from behind. And fumin will kick his chair to wake him up.
- Weejia drawing and writing weird things on our lecture notes.
- Seok Hwee's cold jokes.
- Mugging outside LT.
- Kboxing with usual clique.

There are lots and lots of things i miss..

Getting very emotional.. there are some things i dont wish to say. I would rather keep it inside me, because i know no one would understand. Perhaps as time pass by, i would learn to like it. I hope i dont make the wrong decision once i have decided on it.

Anyway, i just heard a shocking news from my mum. It made me wonder what has become to girls now. Modern girls. They dont cherish themselves.. and they dont think of the consequences..

Shall end here. :)

Ppl are rushing me to update my blog.. But the thing is my time is really tight. I have tons and tons of tutorials, and many notes to read, because i think im still quite behind. Esp physics. Physics really sucks. I hate it. Kind of regret studying engineering, cause' it's all physics concepts. Cant stand it, but i have to endure. 4 years!! Besides that, "somebody" is taking up most of my time too, and i have to set aside some time for... Haha.

Yesterday had an aj clique outing to bugis. Everybody felt so happy and excited when we saw each other.. It really feels good to be able to get down together and talk about stuffs.. and updating each other on things in school. Seems like everyone has changed in one way or another. And as usual, the 5 of us were laughing and talking as loud as usual, like nobody's business. After the bitching around session, we went shopping at bugis village. And they made me wear dress. Dress! Then i will be like busy covering up some parts that are censored. In the end i was the "big winner", cause' i spent the most money. Got labelled "HOT" by them, simply because the skirt i bought was short, - which i dont think so. Then seok kept on telling me that i have changed, and im jiahan no.2, because i wore hot shorts. Hot is not the word for me la. Haha, i will puke.

Anyway, weijing already saw and knew who is "somebody" already. And i still cant believe she actually thinks "somebody" is not bad.

This is for jerrand. BOY, dont so tiko leh. Everytime look for hotties. Then want to sit near that cutie. HAHAHA!

Im broke. Im broke. Im broke. And yet "somebody" kept telling everyone im rich, which is an obvious lie. Lolz.

Missing in action for about 2 weeks. That's because school officially started last week and there's been a lot of things i have to do. I do not really understand what the lecturers are talking about, and i had to go home to read up on my notes and then get stuck for hours for my tutorial. Sometimes even to the extent of crying. But the lucky thing is, after some good rest, answers started popping up in my head. Esp for physics - which is like my worst subject.



Im known to be a computer idiot. And my brother always get fed up with me because i kept making his lap hang. Then he had to fix it. Lolz. And plus, im new to computing course. Imagine. Me! Computers! My head will explode one day. Or rather the keyboard may break into two..



Lots of things happened recently. And i realised every since i went into NTU, i am always seen hanging out with guys. So much so im like being labelled a scandalous girl. Haha.. It's not my fault. It's just the course im in, or maybe im too high most of the time.

Lots of notes to read. Lots of work to do. And not enough time. Imagine.. school has only started like barely 2 weeks and im already studying till 2am in the morning, and got to wake up at 6 to go for lectures the next morning.

Dont really feel like blogging. Im feeling stressed now. :(

It's night time now. And for the whole day, i wasnt exactly in the best of mood. Terrible would be the best word to describe how i feel right now, at this very moment. And the worst thing is i do not know the reason either. I guess i just feel down.

I was pondering over something on the mrt and i realised perhaps i had made the wrong decision in the first place. Because everything went wrong. If i had not done it, i may not feel that way right now. Even to the extent of hatred. It was a decision gone wrong.

Sometimes, i wonder about the true characters and personalities of the friends around me. Are they real, or not. It's tiring, having to guess their thoughts. They may seem simple and sweet on the outside, but you never know what's inside them. Corrupted thoughts. I try my very best to think and believe that my friends are nice, that they are true. But the fact is, some are actually not. Yet, i still do choose to believe them, although i know they are lying. Because i supposed im one who treasure friendships too, and believe it or not, i give in too easily. I thought about it for quite a long time, and im still not sure if i should just give up or continue to play along.

Like what i said, my mood wasnt there. And so when i went to teach my P2 boy for tuition just now, i guess i was a little too harsh. And i felt so guilty, because he was so kind and sweet to give me a kit kat chocolate he got for his chinese test in school, yet i gave him that attitude.

Just came back from CAC Camp. 5 whole days. And not even once did i had a had a good night sleep. The most number of hours of sleep i get was like only 5, and the least was a pathetic 3. That's because we were allowed to go to sleep only at 3 plus. Darn tired. And my eyes cant even open wide.

The first day we went to do our high elements thing at bukit batok, and had to sleep there for 2 nights as well. Our OG did one of the high element called Hour Glass, and it was scary. The girls kept giving lots of excuses to avoid having to do the activity, but in the end we had no choice but to go up. One by one. And lots of people were looking up at you. The legs kept on shaking, but nevertheless we still managed to clear this obstacle. Except that it left 2 scratches on my right arm and blue-blacks on my hand. Ahh i hope it wont leave me with a scar.

Second day we went to sentosa for our beach games. It was quite fun, and the weather was good. Breezy. Did not even have to put on sun block. And i must say our OG is a really "must-win" group. Once we play, we can be very crazy and pia. Very determined to win. So much so we can even resort to cheating. At night time, we had our fright night with a guy partner in one of the "forest" at sentosa. Initially it was really scary, cause' it was dark. And there were people jumping out to scare you. Screamed like mad. And my partner told me im a screamer, cause' the "ghost" scaring me got shocked by my screaming. After that played some games with the jokers, our favourite game- big fish, small fish. My zhi ming shang also. Lost 5 times, had to do forfeit. Darn paiseh. Stood in front of the other OGs, do that "han xing dian bing" thing. And i seriously think they think we are mad. Slept only at 5 am. Zai.

Third day we did amazing race outside campus. That one was really shag. Ran like mad. Practically mad. Night time we had the SP initiation night. Everybody got blingfolded and the girls were being brought to our secret partner. It was really weird, being blindfolded for the whole night. The ogls forced us to hold hands throughout the whole thing, even when we were sitting down talking. My sp was quite a joker also. And i think it's the first time i get to speak in english with someone for so long. Got quite surprised when he told me he was of mixed blood. And i was telling myself, "die, im gg to speak in english." But it turned out quite ok la. At least we do not really have those awkward silence. Cause' most of the time we were basically suan-ning and crapping. Played games with sp. And got my whole body so dirty i had to throw everything away, including my favourite aj pe tee. Shivering like mad also, with toothpaste all over our body. Washed my hair 3 times that night.

Thursday night was the night that everybody dread most, especially the girls, because we thought it was stupid. Haha. It's like getting married la. Girls in the same og were to settle down in one of the hostel rooms. Then the guys will have to go from door to door finding their sp. And they had to do sop-standard operation practice. That is to take off their clothes and sing or dance or whatever. Funny la. Then had to kneel down and propose to the girl. Had a really good laugh. Had dinner with sp at pariss. So expensive yet not nice. Then went around for some walk tog and people thought i got kidnapped.

Had clubbing also, at DXO. First time. First dance. Everyone is practically high. Danced like nobody's business.

Then friday is the last day for camp. Not much. Just the skid and cheer fight thing. We won the best OG. And till now i still could not believe it, because seriously speaking, we do not feel enthu at all. Haha. But i think, at least we do enjoyed ourselves and the team spirit is there. Won the cheer fight also. Fabia freshies really are the best!!!!! Loads of jokers around too. And i think almost everyone was aware of the big group of ajcians in fabia.

By the way, i agreed with what Sel said. That is this whole camp thing is all about matchmaking. Heard it's because it was sponsored by sdu, and it was believed that smart+smart = smart babies. Funniest theory ever heard.

Anyway, in a few days time, school will be starting. And i do not really look forward to it. Felt quite sian. Having to go over the making friends-studying process all over again. Duh.

Had a very packed schedule yesterday. Or rather busy. Many stuffs to handle in just one day. First up in the morning, went for the ntu medical check-up, accompanied by jiahui. And when i thought i will be the only girl there, i was wrong. There was an equal number between the 2 sexes. Did not see any eye-candies, just one. One single one. Haha. Not bad, and jiahui agreed with me. Realised his name was nelson. The others were, like normal. Haha. Pin pin fan fan. The girls were, normal too.

Then, went to the subordinate court to settle some stuffs. Wah, looked quite grand. And lawyers looked cool. Too bad, i have no such chance to be one in my life anymore. Haha.

After which, went shopping around at orchard. A very rushed one. Bought a top which i liked very much. THEN, met up with weej and fm for dinner. Nth much la, just talked and laughed about some jc stuffs last time. Especially the one about daljit, newspaper readings all that. Come to think of it, really miss those times. Kept on forcing weej to talk about previous crush(if he had). And he kept denying it. Face also darn red. Hai xiu lehh.

Next week will be my last week in olympus. Really last week. Cannot extend anymore, because i will be gg to orientation camp and the going on to pursue my studies. A colleague asked me if i will feel sad. I guess, yes. But, who knows i may return back to work 4 yrs later? Haha.

Thinking of studying freaks me out. And it's the subject i hate most. Physics. ahhh. What force. Work done. And many many formulas. Dead.

I can foresee it's going to be a really hectic week for me, because my schedule is sooo packed, at least for this week. Maybe next week i will be more free, but it all have to depend on my bunch of friends. Haha. Im basically booked full this week, from mon-sun. Imagine.

Today, after work, i met up with sx for gym session at woodlands stadium. I know it might sound ridiculous for me to go there for a gym session. Ya indeed, after a good sweating out, i felt too tired to even walk all the way from the stadium back to woodlands mrt. But, being a sportswoman once, still managed to drag my legs there. Just that it's a little dark over there, and i kept looking back to see if there are anyone following me. Thinking back, i still miss netball times. Haha. So much so i intend to join netball and pool in uni.

Tml, im gonna go swimming with jh. I swear i must learn that frogstyle well. It looked easy, but it's actually not. I think freestyle is easier, just that it requires more strength. That means, im going to be home late again.

Wednesday, im teaching a p2 student tuition at admiralty after work. And i hope i dont get lost, because i have absolutely no sense of direction. Teach till 9. Gonna lie dead on the bed after i reached home.

Thurs, yoga class.

Fri, Review+gym/___

Sat, tutoring

Sun, tutoring

See, how packed my schedule is. One word - TIRED.

Anyway, i guess im a little too obsessed with skincare products. Drank a bottle of rock sugar bird's nest every once in 3 days, at night time. That is 3 bottles a week. Initially had wanted to drink every night, but considering the money factor, reduced it to just once in 3 days. Guess at a age of 19, we should start to take care of our skin already.

Yupps. That should be all. Guess i wont have the time to update again within this week, so stop nagging at me! Esp shuai ge- weejia. Hahaa. :)

-They stopped moving forward. And simply just leave it there, still, withstanding the test of time. No one wants to take a step forward, to let it grow, and bear fruit. If only someone takes the initiative, im sure a miracle would happen.-

I went TTSH to take my spinal x-ray last week cause' of my back pain which is killing me sometimes. And the doctor told me the formation of one of the bones at my spinal tail is different from normal people. That is i have one big bone instead of 2 small ones, which means im actually more inflexible at the lower back, hence the pain. So, i have to bear with it, for i have no choice.

Went exercising 3 times this week, once swimming, once running and once yoga. Time really flies, as i have learnt yoga for 7 mths. And the current yoga class im going to now is going to end soon, and im thinking of signing up for the intermediate class, after being in 2 elemetary classes before. Haha.

Today, received 2 msgs. One from sx, the other jiahui. Both asking me to go swimming. Lolz. Im going to be darn busy next week. 7 days a week, and im teaching tuition 3 times a week, 3 times exercising, 1 day shopping/rest. Duh. Tired.

Anyway i was in a company yesterday doing some review and i was sitting opposite these 2 aunties. And i can see that they keep looking and smiling at me. Then one of the auntie actually went over to where i was sitting and started telling me that i have very nice radiance, then going on to say they want to have such nice radiance like mine. After which i saw the same auntie in the lift, and she told me im pretty. I think some stamp must have been stuck onto her eyes. Hahaa. I think how one presents herself does matters, including the clothes you wear.

Yupps. Gg to chiong exercising like hell next week. Sweat all out. Lolz.