long time no see....

yoyoyoyyoyoyoyo everyone this is nu ren's nan ren hunky hunk here. hahahaha my nu ren asked me to blog for her so here i am blogging!!! the last time i blogged for her was like somewhere last year??? lol. helped her to blog to push down her ARDENT FANS LOL.

anyway, my nu ren is still doing fine. as fine as a grain of rice, as fine as spitting on the ground and kena fine $500. ok not funny i know=s. for those ardent fans of her who wants to know how is she, she is still the same basically. hahaha. she says she dont want to blog cos nothing to blog. but i beg to differ. must be too many things to blog liao but she dont know where to start from. lol. and as her nan ren who have always been helping her to change her blogskin, i know the picture has gone missing for a few months, and she doesnt know how to edit the html from her very first blog till now. LOL. but i'm also lazy to help her change since she dont blog also. haha. anyway, simplicity is beauty, so just leave it as it is! haha.

ya so help her blog until here lo. dont worry, she is still as mei li as ever. BUT BEWARE OF SOMETHING: she has gone crazy recently cos she always like to put smiley faces in her smses. very scary cos it's so unlike her and everytime she puts smiley in her sms my small and beautiful little heart will jump as tall as me =p hahahah crappppppppp.

~CHEERIOS~

Ok ardent fans of my blog im sorry. I think i broke my own record for not blogging ever since july. =P

Just too busy, lethargic and sian to update my blog. Things come and go so i dont know how to start blogging this post. Hahaa. Anyway i finally get myself busy with something in uni already! And it's really very busy and stressful.

During the cca recruitment week, i managed to talk weijing into going for the interview for cac impresario 2009 as programmer with me, although she knows practically nothing about cac impresario. Hahaa felt a little pitiful for her during the interview because i can see she's trying v. hard to crap through it. Basically in the end i was chosen as business manager. Shocked when i received the call from chairman to confirm me as biz mag because i didnt expect myself to get such a high post. At that point of time i suddenly felt my status being elevated. Lol. Finally i got myself into something using my own capabilities! 1 week later, i was appointed chief business manager among the other biz mags. I thought all i had to do was just to be a leader to the others, and report to vice-chair on our progress. But i was very wrong because other than reporting to vice-chair and taking care of my biz mags, i was also in charge of chairing our meeting every mon and, be a representive to update the whole main comm about our progress and also doing a lot more stuffs than the others. I find it hard to get used to it, even up till now. Felt so stressed up and down these days, msg all my close friends out, but got rejected by all. Haiz. But at least, what i present to my employer in the future will not be just a stupid uni cert, but something better. At least i have something to offer - experience, considering the fact that most uni grads only hold a uni cert with nothing else. YEA!!!

Yah lazy to blog liao la. Better than nth. Hahhaa

It was supposed to be his birthday celebration on the 5th of july. I was supposed to give him a pleasant surprise plus a nice dinner, but everything failed. Reason being- His big mouth and self-proclaimed intelligent mind.
Damn, he knew everything i wanted to do beforehand.
Spoiler is what i called him.
Anyway, although i shouldnt say sorry for the screwed-up celebration, but i still do feel guilty la. In the end you made all the decisions on that day. But the most funny part was that we had lunch at fish & co glass house and dinner at boon lay zhi char hawker centre.
But still, we had a nice and fun night out. :)

Hey youuu. You spoiler - yes ya la this is to you. YOU! You better read this. Thanks for your 2 'presents' for me on your bdae celebration. Thanks for taking out your time. And thanks for silently contributing and i hadnt realised i wasnt contributing for the past 2 months.. (yea that goddamn $350). Thanks for wanting to pay for the singapore flyer ride, but because i felt so guilty for not contributing so i rejected your offer. Thanks for you wanting to give me a surprise by waiting for me at my office (although it failed).

Well, although your attitude is still as fucked-up as ever, but sometimes you still do deserve a thumbs-up for your little effort (i know i dont always realise it..).

Oh ya, stop buying chocolates for me and then end up eating everything up yourself can!! It's for me loRRR! I havent even had one bite and you already finished it. And you will always give me that famous quote from you:"It's the sincerity that counts." Your head la. Yea sincere as in at least you bought for me right. Blaa. ICE-CREAM also! I bought the bloody $5 icecream and i got to eat only like 3 small miserable mouthfuls. Well done. My drinks also. I just turned my head away for a short while and the moment i turned back, the drink is gone. Empty. Not even one drop left for me. The m ost bloody incident is the oyster egg one. You ate all the oysters away while i wasnt looking, leaving ugly holes on the oyster egg. $5 of oyster egg, and i only ate $0.50 worth of egg. You really is the most ungentleman guy i have ever seen. Good job!! Since you have a sweet-tooth, seriously one day you will either die of diabetes/heart attack. Lolz.

If there's a reason for you to hate me,
then there's a thousand more reasons for me to hate you.

If there's one touching moment that you have given me,
then there's a thousand more touching moments i have given you.

If there's a time when you truly cared about me,
then there's a thousand more carings that i have showered you.

If there's a time when you make sacrifices for me,
then there's a thousand more sacrifices i have made for you.

If there's a time when you truly wanted to see me smile,
then there's a thousand more times when i have made you smile.

If there's a time you finally cherish me,
then there's a thousand more times i have cherished you.

If there comes a time when you have fallen in love with me,
then you would have realised me too late.

If there's a time when you finally realised everything,
I might be gone.

Im being drained of everything. I can no longer provide. I have given enough.

And i have come to a decision. Something has to be given up in order for me to move on. I made a decision i might regret for the rest of my life.

It came as a sudden realisation to me that one day, somehow or another, we will change. Be it to the better or to the worse, we will change. Everyone has to go through a this challenging phase in their lives. Whether or not you chose to accept it is your own perception on how you perceive things to be.

People will change for 2 reasons. 1) When they have undergone the most challenging task/obstacle in their lives. 2) When they realised they have no more reason to continue spurring on.

The results of these two reasons of change have two extreme effects on people. One, to cause the person to be stronger and face up to the reality of the world, or two, to lose all motivation and being a little crude here, that is to waste your life away without achieving anything.

I used to resign myself to my fate, and used to blame everything else including god when i fail in something i do. Each time i do that, the more i feel that i do not belong in this universe. I wasn't contented with what i have thus far. Finally, i harbour the thought of giving up.

Then, this person came along and he forced me to grow up. I wasnt used to his mature way of thinking and i made a lot of fuss about it. Slowly, i was influenced by his way of thinking, his way of building up his network for success in the future. I thought long and hard about the type of life i want to lead. I do not want to waste my life away. I do not want to stay put with only a few good friends around me, shopping and playing when im free. If i continue that way, i will never succeed in the future. I have so much more to learn.

Sometimes, in order to succeed, it's inevitable that something has to be given up.

When everything turns into hatred.

I realised i have changed. It's scary.

And it's you. Deep down, i hate you.

It's hard being the girl behind you.
Though easy it may seem, but it requires a brand new me.
Im not used to it, neither am i accustomed to it.
And the effort is, tremendous.

Patience, is all i gave.
It doesnt comes easily, especially when it's from me.
But do you even know that i exist?

You took my presence for granted
Because of the time i gave
But have you ever,
set aside time for me in your diary?

I was aware,
of your family,studies and friends
But i have not request much,
just that you will appreciate what i have done, thus far.

It's a challenge to be with you,
with the obstacles i had to cross
and the tolerance i had to give
My endurance ever so high
Are you aware, of what you are putting me through?

I wasnt recognised
neither was i treated rightly
In front of your friends, i was nothing.
Do you care, the amount of pain i once felt.

You are afraid
And you are hiding
But, how does it feel,
to not face up to your feelings?

It's hard, to be with you.
It's hard, to like you.
It's hard to be the girl behind you.
When will you take my sorrows away?