Today's feelings was a heavy one.
It was peer-review assessment for our MP4011 Design Project. Unlike the previous peer-review assessments which I have done before, this one was a more special case. Each group member was being called up into a room where the Professor will ask you to grade your team-mates according to the respective criterias.
Chloe went in first and told the Professor that she intends to give all F grades for all the criterias for this team-mate - M. The Professor then called up M and talked to her, and advised her to talk to us. M left the Professor's room feeling weird so she came and asked us what happened. I then took the lead to tell her our heartfelt feelings. Instead of understanding, she started to blabber about how we shouldn't do this to her and we should just tell her face to face first, and that we did not give her chance to do her work and so we condem her etc. Desrie and I spent half an hour in our design lab explaining to her but M just cant get it into her head and feels that she is not wrong. M then started to cry and her voice becomes louder, even though there are other class mates in the lab as well. I managed to speak to her still in a very calm manner but I guess I gave a very guai lan face. Desrie couldn't control her emotions well so at one point of time she was shouting too. The atmosphere was really awkward and bad and I hate being in this kind of situation and would avoid as much as possible. But still, when it comes to work, it has to be put aside with personal feelings and friendships. This I feel that M has not handled in a proper manner. If I am not wrong, she must be feeling that I had betrayed her and there will be no more friendship between us, although I would still very much want to continue our friendship. The story behind this incident is too long and hence I shall not further elaborate here.
Ask me if I regret what I had done, I must say - No. I believe that through this, M will be able to learn a lesson and if she still treats me as a friend, she must understand that what I am doing is not to harm her, but to help her learn.
Anyway through what happened today, I realised that actually Desrie is a very nice lady. I think I have misunderstood her all these while.. It takes me 3.5 years to finally realise that she can be a really good friend.
