Same people, different treatment.

Mood: Sad

Just had a quarrel with my mum.

Me: I got something to discuss with you, but you cannot be angry.
Her: What? Must be something up to no good.
Me: Want to ask if I can buy a new phone cause' my phone has some problems already..
Her: You want to buy dont buy so expensive one, save some money for yourself.
Me: But I will have to upgrade my plan to iphone plan.
Her: UPGRADE?! How much?
Me: $36/mth.
Her: (Shouting at me) Please la you. I already paying for a lot of things already and you still want to add on to my burden. You know plus gst everything one month can make up to $40 anot?! My salary already not alot, what you want me to do!!
Me: I can make up for the additional $10 by giving $10 to you every month. If not I can pay for my own phone bill..
Her: (Shout) Your money also I give you one what! You think you alot of money is it?
Me: I got teach tuition one, I still can afford to give $10 every month what.
Her: (Shouting and ranting all the way...) @#$$YU*&*&^*&#!!

Actually I understand the plight that my family is in now.. Thats why I wanted to discuss with her before I buy the phone.. but it seems like she doesnt want to speak to me nicely..

Since young, I have always been deprived of material things as compared to my brother. He always has the latest games, handphones etc.. all bought by my parents when he was still schooling. He doesn't even have to work part-time to buy what he want. What about me.. the handphones.. crayons i used in secondary school etc, I bought them using my own money which I saved. I even remembered asking my mum why my brother do not have to use his money but I have to, and got scolded for some reason in the end. Then now, as I am still schooling I even had to teach 2 tuitions to earn my own allowance, despite my already very tight schedule in school.

I still remember once, for my Sec 4 graduation day @ some hotel.. Each student is required to pay $50 for the ticket. So thinking of lessening my mum's burden, I went home and told my mum that the ticket costs $50 and that it is v. expensive. Without listening to what I was about to say next, she scolded me and told me that she has no money. I cried after that, because I had wanted to tell her that I can pay for the ticket myself.

I am not blaming my parents. They are really good to me. I guess the reason why is because they just wanted me to learn to depend on myself. But... there's too many buts. Every family has their own problems.

Sometimes I wonder, is it because of one person's selfishness in the family that the whole family has to suffer? I do not wish to elaborate more on this... He really hasnt contribute enough to help the family more.. despite him being the son.